


'Til the End of the (Phone) Line

by yeehaw7



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, but it's like in a flashback way, i know that letter fics are called epistolary fics but i don't know what this would be called, mentions of teen sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:01:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28762980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeehaw7/pseuds/yeehaw7
Summary: a collection of telephone conversation transcripts from 1944 - 2023.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this was originally supposed to just be a phone call between bucky and his sister but then i got carried away and went until the (current as of jan 2021) end of canon for steve & bucky ?? there's a lot of gaps and it's not very cohesive but it was fun to try a new medium of fic, even if it didn't work out well. 
> 
> also ?? the battle of accuracy vs just not caring from a fic writer is so bizarre. i watched civil war and paused on the package tony gets from steve at the end to find out what month civil war likely occurred in (the package was sent on april 14 with 2 day delivery so likely arrived around april 16). i also timed myself reading each section of the fic out loud in order to get the call time right. i researched the etymology of the insult "sod" which apparently is a mostly british one which made me go "oops can't have an american say that" even though ?? it's fic so does it really matter THAT much ?? but anyway. i took so long on this for what it is so i hope you get at least vague enjoyment from this if not i'm sorry

_ Transcription of telephone conversation between James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes and family, November 1944. Originally an SSR file, transferred to and taken from SHIELD database.  _

_ Telephone dialing tone..  _

Rebecca Barnes: Hello? 

James Barnes: Hello!

Rebecca Barnes: Bucky! I didn’t know if it was going to go through. We’ve tried calling more than once already and no luck. 

James Barnes: Yeah, the cables here are a little shot. 

Rebecca Barnes: Literally or figuratively?

_ J.B. laughs, short and stilted.  _

James Barnes: Maybe a bit of both. You doing okay?

Rebecca Barnes: Geez, Buck, I should be the one asking you that. But yeah. We’re okay. 

_ J.B. clears his throat. When he speaks again, his voice cracks slightly. _

James Barnes: Tell me everything. Anything. You can only fit so much into a letter. 

Rebecca Barnes: Aw, are you crying?

James Barnes: Knock it off, you know I ain’t. 

Rebecca Barnes: You miss me. 

James Barnes: Okay, yeah, maybe a little. What have you been up to?

Rebecca Barnes: Well. You know David from two doors down?   
_ J.B. chuckles.  _

James Barnes: Yeah. I told you, he likes you.

Rebecca Barnes: I didn’t think you were being serious!

James Barnes: Of course, I was being serious. I wouldn’t interfere in your love life, Becks. 

_ R.B. laughs warmly, indignantly.  _

Rebecca Barnes: Of course. Why would you do such a thing. 

James Barnes: So?

Rebecca Barnes: So what?

James Barnes: So what did he do?

Rebecca Barnes: He asked me out. 

James Barnes: And?

Rebecca Barnes: I told him I’d have to check with my dad. 

_ J.B. snorts. _

James Barnes: Like that would hold you back. 

Rebecca Barnes: I couldn’t just tell him no! He’s usually quite nice. 

James Barnes: Usually? 

Rebecca Barnes: Well, I don’t know. There’s been a couple of rumors, that’s all. 

James Barnes: If he tries anything, tell him he’ll have me to deal with when I get home. 

Rebecca Barnes: Yeah, okay. 

James Barnes: I gotta play up the big brother authority every now and then.

Rebecca Barnes: Whatever you say, Buck. 

_ The line falls silent for a few seconds.  _

Rebecca Barnes: So how come we’re getting a big fancy phone call all of a sudden? Ma has been fluffing around about it. She thinks it means you’re hurt. 

James Barnes: Nah, it’s just that being Captain America’s sidekick gets you perks. Today, that includes a semi-secure phone line. Tell Ma I’m fine. 

_ There is a slightly muffled conversation on R.B's end of the line.  _

Rebecca Barnes: She doesn’t believe you. She wants to talk to you. 

James Barnes: Hand me over, then. 

_ The phone passes hands.  _

Mrs Barnes: Hello? 

James Barnes: Hi, Ma. 

Mrs Barnes: Are you okay? Is everything alright?

James Barnes: It is, I promise. Not so much as a scratch on me. 

Mrs Barnes: Is that an exaggeration?

James Barnes: Maybe I have a couple bruises. That’s all. 

_ Mrs B. lets out a sigh of relief. _

Mrs Barnes: That’s good to hear, then. I hope you’re eating well enough. 

James Barnes: Better than a lot of other folk. You should see Steve, he’s like a human hoover. He needs so much food a day that the whole team gets loaded up with a truckload of rations every time we head off-base. 

Mrs Barnes: Good. Tell him I said hello, wouldn’t you?   
James Barnes: You can tell him yourself, if you want. 

_ The phone line is muffled from J.B's end, presumably by his hand. A shout of “Oi, Rogers!” is heard faintly.  _

James Barnes: Sorry. The rest of the guys are trying to teach him how to shoot straight.    
Mrs Barnes: That’s alright. I expected you all would be busy. 

_ The phone passes hands _ .

Steve Rogers: Hello?

_ Mrs B chuckles, voice warm.  _

Mrs Barnes: Hello, Steve. How are you?

Steve Rogers: I’m good, actually. How’re the twins?

Mrs Barnes: They started school yesterday. Seem to be enjoying it so far. 

Steve Rogers: Oh good, I’m glad to hear it. 

Mrs Barnes: Tell me, honestly, how is Bucky?

_ There’s a muffled thunk and S.R. groans slightly as if he took an elbow to the stomach. _

Steve Rogers: As well as any of us can be, ma’am. Sleeps enough so that he doesn’t look like a wandering zombie, most days. I think he’ll be glad for it all to be over. 

Mrs Barnes: And you? 

Steve Rogers: Doing better than I was back home, that’s for sure. 

Mrs Barnes: That’s right, Bucky wrote to me all about it. Is it true that everything has been healed up?

Steve Rogers: Just about! 

Mrs Barnes: You must feel wonderful. 

_ S.R. chuckles.  _

Steve Rogers: I really do. 

Mrs Barnes: Well, I’ll let you get back to it. Stay safe, won’t you? And please. Please look after my boy. Make sure both of you come home in one piece. 

_ S.R’s voice softens.  _

Steve Rogers: I will, I promise. Don’t you worry. 

Mrs Barnes: Goodnight! 

Steve Rogers: Goodnight!

_ The phone passes hands.  _

James Barnes: All good? 

Mrs Barnes: All good. What time is it where you are?

James Barnes: Nearly eleven or thereabouts. 

Mrs Barnes: You should be getting some rest. 

James Barnes: Is Dad there at all?

Mrs Barnes: Oh, of course. I’ll go get him for you. The twins are out at the moment, unfortunately. 

James Barnes: That’s alright. 

Mrs Barnes: Oh, here he is. Bucky wants to speak to you. 

_ The phone is passed to Mr B. _

Mr Barnes: Hello?

James Barnes: Hiya. Garage still running?

Mr Barnes: Only just. Less and less people coming in every day. We’ll manage, I suppose. 

James Barnes: I’ll see if I can get some of my check sent home. I’m not using it out here, anyways. 

Mr Barnes: You don’t have to, Buck. We’ll be fine. 

James Barnes: It would make me feel better to know that you’ve got extra support, Dad. 

Mr Barnes: If you’re sure. 

James Barnes: I am. How’s Ma coping?

Mr Barnes: Oh, you know. She worries. We do what we can. Those letters of yours help, a lot. 

_ The line is silent for several seconds. _

Mr Barnes: Get some sleep while you can, son. 

James Barnes: Yeah. Yeah, okay. 

_ It is important to note that J.B’s voice is significantly quieter.  _

Mr Barnes: I’ll see you when I see you. Goodnight. 

James Barnes: Goodnight. 

_ The phone is passed back to Mrs B _ . 

Mrs Barnes: You heard him. Off you go. 

James Barnes: Okay, alright, I’ll go. 

_ The line falls silent. _

Mrs Barnes: Be safe. They say it’ll be over soon. 

James Barnes: They’ve been saying that all along. 

Mrs Barnes: Well, let’s hope they mean it this time. 

James Barnes: Alright. 

Mrs Barnes: I love you. 

James Barnes: I love you too. 

_ Call ended: 3 minutes and 44 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Steve Rogers and Mrs Barnes, March 1945. Originally an SSR file, transferred to and taken from SHIELD database.  _

_ Telephone dialing tone..  _

Mrs Barnes: Hello, you’ve reached the Barnes residence.

Steve Rogers: It’s Steve. 

Mrs Barnes: Oh! You’re the last person I was expecting, but I can’t say that I’m not glad to hear from you. Is everything alright?

_ S.R. takes a deep breath. When he speaks again, his voice is rough. _

Steve Rogers: I’m so sorry. 

Mrs Barnes: Steve? 

Steve Rogers: He died two days ago in the Alps. 

_ The line is silent besides from a muffled sob from Mrs B.  _

Mrs Barnes: How did it happen? 

Steve Rogers: He… I think he was trying to protect me. Cover my back. A Hydra agent blew a hole in the side of the train carriage we were in and he was sucked out. I’m sorry… 

_ S.R. breathes in sharply.  _

Steve Rogers: I’m sorry I couldn’t keep him safe for you.

Mrs Barnes: Thank you for trying, anyway, Steve. 

Steve Rogers: I wish I could have done more. 

Mrs Barnes: If there’s anything I know about Bucky, it’s that he doesn’t regret it. Following you. He thought the world of you, you know. 

_ S.R. and Mrs B share a moment of silence. Eventually, S.R. sniffs and says wetly; _

Steve Rogers: I hope you’re right. Is there anything I can do? 

Mrs Barnes: No, no. We’ll manage. Make sure you come home safe, alright? You’re family, too. 

Steve Rogers: Thank you. I’ll do my best. 

Mrs Barnes: Take care of yourself, Steve. 

Steve Rogers: You too. 

_ Call ended: 1 minute and 38 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Colonel Phillips and Mrs Barnes, March 1945. Originally an SSR file, transferred to and taken from SHIELD database. _

_ Telephone dialing tone..  _

Mrs Barnes: Hello?

Colonel Phillips: Is this Mrs Barnes? 

Mrs Barnes: It is. 

Colonel Phillips: Steve Rogers has you down as his next of kin. Are you aware of that?

Mrs Barnes: He mentioned it in a letter recently. Why, is he alright?

Colonel Phillips: I am calling to inform you of his death, ma’am.

_ Mrs B. draws a shaky breath.  _

Colonel Phillips: He died saving America from a bombing that would have wiped out entire cities. 

Mrs Barnes: That… I’m glad he went out doing something he believed in. 

Colonel Phillips: I assume you knew him well? 

Mrs Barnes: Bucky… my son, he and Steve were best friends since they were children. Steve was functionally one of my own. 

Colonel Phillips: You will know, then, that he was a good man. 

Mrs Barnes: He was, indeed. He had a strong heart.

Colonel Phillips: I admired him for it. Is there anyone else I can call for you? Does he have any living relatives?

Mrs Barnes: No, it’s just us. His mother died when he was eighteen. 

Colonel Phillips: I’m sorry to hear that. 

Mrs Barnes: Thank you for calling, Mr…?

Colonel Phillips: Phillips. 

Mrs Barnes: Thank you, Mr Phillips. If you’ll excuse me…

Colonel Phillips: Of course. Take care. 

_ Call ended: 48 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Steve Rogers and Margaret “Peggy” Carter, September 2011. Taken from a SHIELD database.  _

Steve Rogers: Hello? Who’s this?

Margaret Carter: It’s Peggy, darling. 

_ There is the sound of something like a stack of books falling over from S.R’s end of the line and a muffled swear.  _

Margaret Carter: I hope this isn’t a bad time?

Steve Rogers: No, no, not at all! How are you?

Margaret Carter: Fairly well. Are you adjusting? 

Steve Rogers: Slowly. Nothing that I imagined back then that would exist now actually does. 

_ M.C. laughs. _

Margaret Carter: I know exactly what you mean. 

Steve Rogers: Stark’s flying cars, for one. 

Margaret Carter: Oh, trust me, he tried. Even the last model he made - in the 80s, I think - exploded in his face. 

Steve Rogers: Y’know. I never had any major concerns about the serum  _ until _ Howard Stark walked into the room and that’s when I thought, “I’m going to die today.” 

Margaret Carter: His flying cars  _ are _ a perfect analogy for his personality...

_ S.R. laughs.  _

Margaret Carter: Have you heard much from SHIELD about going back into active duty?

Steve Rogers: I haven’t heard anything yet. 

Margaret Carter: There are other choices now, you know.

_ The line is silent for several seconds. _

Steve Rogers: I know. 

Margaret Carter: How do you feel? About it all. 

Steve Rogers: How do you mean?

Margaret Carter: Are you tired of it? Or do you have fight left in you? I’m guessing it’s more of the latter. 

_ S.R. laughs _ . 

Steve Rogers: I’ll always have fight left in me. For the right cause. 

_ M.C. chuckles. _

Margaret Carter: I knew you’d say that. But really, if you want an out, there are several. 

Steve Rogers: I.. I think I’ll see how it is first. Captain America has changed a lot since I’ve been gone. I don’t know if he is exactly standing for what I believe in, anymore. 

_ M.C. winces, sucking air through her teeth.  _

Margaret Carter: Yes, well, the Cold War did a number on him. 

Steve Rogers: I feel like it’s become layer upon layer of propaganda. I don’t even understand where half of it has come from, yet. 

Margaret Carter: If you need any help, I’ll always be right here. 

Steve Rogers: Thanks, Peggy. 

Margaret Carter: Anytime. 

Steve Rogers: Sorry, I should get going. I’m still settling in and all that. 

Margaret Carter: I’ll let you continue, then. Ring me, occasionally. 

Steve Rogers: I will. Bye!

Margaret Carter: Bye, Steve. 

_ Call ended: 1 minute and 21 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Sam Wilson and Steve Rogers, June 2015. Taken from Avengers secure database.  _

Steve Rogers: Find anything? 

Sam Wilson: Nothing. The place was stripped completely. 

_ S.R. groans.  _

Steve Rogers: Another dead end. 

Sam Wilson: Steve, I don't know about this anymore. 

Steve Rogers: It's okay if you don't want to keep doing this, I understand. You've done a lot for me, already. 

Sam Wilson: I'm not talking about me. 

_ S.R. sighs.  _

Steve Rogers: I can't stop, Sam. 

Sam Wilson: I know. I know, but something tells me he doesn't want to be found. If he remembered you then- 

Steve Rogers: He pulled me from the river for a reason. The footage from the Smithsonian is only a couple days afterward. He remembered enough to go looking for the rest, and whether he remembers it on his own or not, he knows who I am. 

Sam Wilson: That's my point. If he knows who you are, why is he still running? 

_ S.R. sighs again and wooden chair creaks, presumably as he sits.  _

Steve Rogers: Bucky never liked being open with his emotions. Maybe he's scared he might still hurt me. I don't know. But I have to find him, Sam. Before anyone else does. 

Sam Wilson: I think you should take a break. 

Steve Rogers: Sam- 

Sam Wilson: Hey, I'm not saying a long one. A week, maybe two. Nat and I will tell you if we find anything. 

_ The line is silent for a few moments.  _

Steve Rogers: Yeah, alright. But two weeks, maximum. If its longer than that I'll start to get antsy. 

_ S.W. laughs.  _

Sam Wilson: Dude, you're already antsy and you haven't even started yet. 

_ S.R. snorts.  _

Steve Rogers: I know. I just… I can't leave him alone. I made him a promise, a long time ago. 

_ S.W. sighs, then speaks softly.  _

Sam Wilson: I know, Steve. And I'll do everything I can to help you fulfil it. 

Steve Rogers: Thank you. You don't have to be doing this. 

Sam Wilson: There's very few places I'd rather be. 

Steve Rogers: Oh yeah? Like where? 

Sam Wilson: Like somewhere that doesn't smell like sweat and gunmetal. My bathtub, maybe. 

_ S.R. laughs.  _

Steve Rogers: I'll meet you at your place with dinner. Same as usual? 

Sam Wilson: Steve Rogers, did I ever tell you that you're a godsend? 

Steve Rogers: You didn't, I already know. 

_ S.W. snorts.  _

Sam Wilson: Yeah, okay, hot stuff. I want my bath and Chinese, get moving. 

Steve Rogers: Yessir. 

_ Call ended: 1 minute and 42 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanoff, April 2016. Taken from Avengers secure database. _

Natasha Romanoff: Yeah? 

Steve Rogers: Are you alright?

Natasha Romanoff: Uh, yeah, thanks, I got lucky. 

_ Ambulance sirens sound in the background. _

Natasha Romanoff: I know how much Barnes means to you, I really do. Stay home. You’ll only make this worse, for all of us. Please. 

Steve Rogers: Are you saying you’ll arrest me?

Natasha Romanoff: No. Someone will, if you interfere, that’s how it works now. 

Steve Rogers: If he’s this far gone, Nat, I should be the one to bring him in. 

Natasha Romanoff: Why? 

Steve Rogers: Because I’m the one least likely to die trying. 

_ Call ended: 39 seconds. _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Steve Rogers and James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, June 2018. Taken from the Royal Wakanda Database.  _

James Barnes: I was wondering when you'd call. 

Steve Rogers: Sorry, got caught up. 

James Barnes: Another mission?

Steve Rogers: Residual Hydra agents attempting a bank heist. Didn't go well for them, but their backup team nearly kicked our asses. 

James Barnes: They're locked up now? 

Steve Rogers: We left them tied up on the doorstep of a local police station. 

James Barnes: Nice. 

Steve Rogers: How are things going for you? 

James Barnes: I'm beginning to remember a little more. 

Steve Rogers: Still getting headaches?

James Barnes: Yeah. I’ve got meds that work most of the time now, though. 

Steve Rogers: That's great! 

_ There is a brief silence apart from the beep of a keycard swipe and a door opening and closing on J.B’s end.  _

James Barnes: Do you remember the first and only time you had someone else over at your place? 

Steve Rogers: How do you mean? 

James Barnes: As in, "brought someone home", had someone over. 

Steve Rogers: Oh. Oh God, yes, unfortunately. 

James Barnes: And you panicked that your ma would pick up that your room smelled like sex when she got home after her late shift, so you- 

Steve Rogers: So I started frying onions and carried the pan through the whole house. Yeah. 

_ J.B. laughs.  _

James Barnes: Didn't you say you even left a plate of onions under your bed just to make sure? 

Steve Rogers: Yeah, and then she came into my room a few hours later and I had to say something stupid to cover it up.

James Barnes: She caught on, didn't she? Eventually?

Steve Rogers: I forgot to wash my sheets before she got home because I was so preoccupied with the smell. 

James Barnes: So she caught you washing them at three in the morning. 

_ S.R. laughs, embarrassed.  _

Steve Rogers: Yeah. Then I had the sex talk while we were both half asleep. 

James Barnes: God. 

Steve Rogers: I was horrified. I was about ready to launch myself out the window. 

James Barnes: Yeah, well, speaking of, I remember you launching me out the window with my pants halfway down my legs when you heard your ma unlocking the front door. 

Steve Rogers: It's one thing for your mother to know you're having sex, it's another for her to know  _ who _ you're having sex with. I wasn't going to face that. 

James Barnes: She was fine with it, though, wasn't she? That's the part I don't remember.

Steve Rogers: She only brought it up at the end, when she was sick. The only issue she had was, quote, "I'm not sure whether you're this way because it's who you are, or because you get a thrill out of going against the law, but. Whatever makes you happy is good enough for me." 

_ J.B. laughs.  _

James Barnes: I do remember thinking that more than a few times, at the start. 

Steve Rogers: But you don't now? 

James Barnes: For one, it's been a while. For another, it’s legal now.

_ S.R. laughs.  _

Steve Rogers: That's what made you sure? Knowing it's legal in the US? 

_ J.B. snorts.  _

James Barnes: Amongst other things. 

_ The line is silent for a few moments. J.B. draws a breath, then speaks softly.  _

James Barnes: Why didn't you tell me? 

_ S.R. sucks in a breath through his teeth, then exhales.  _

Steve Rogers: I didn't want to push you. 

James Barnes: That's not your decision to make, Steve. 

Steve Rogers: I know. I think I was worried that you'd never remember and you would feel like you owed me something. 

James Barnes: I do feel like I owe you. But not for that. 

Steve Rogers: You'll never owe me anything. 

James Barnes: I knew you'd say that. Steve, I would love you whether I remembered it or not. It  _ was _ "end of the line", wasn't it? Not "when Bucky gets his memory erased and spends years trying to get it back"? 

_ S.R. snorts lightly.  _

Steve Rogers: It was. 

James Barnes: Then believe it. 

Steve Rogers: Okay. I love you too. 

James Barnes: Sap. You should probably get going, yeah? 

Steve Rogers: I've got a rendezvous with Nat in ten minutes, so yeah. 

James Barnes: Alright. Call anytime. I'll be here, no matter what time it is. 

Steve Rogers: I'll still try not to wake you up. 

James Barnes: I'd rather you wake me up at four in the morning than have to wait a whole week until you can find another time. 

Steve Rogers: Noted. What time is it now? 

James Barnes: 9pm. 

Steve Rogers: Okay, well. Goodnight! 

_ J.B. chuckles.  _

James Barnes: Goodnight, Steve.

_ Call ended: 2 minutes and 52 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone conversation between Natasha Romanoff and Steve Rogers, October 2021. Taken from Avengers secure database.  _

Natasha Romanoff: Heard anything from Clint?

Steve Rogers: Nothing. I’ve got a couple places to try next, but none of them are anything solid.

Natasha Romanoff: Fuck. 

Steve Rogers: I’m sorry, Nat. 

Natasha Romanoff: I’ll deal. Anything from Thor?

Steve Rogers: Still in New Asgard. Still drunk most hours of the day. 

Natasha Romanoff: We should pay him a visit. 

Steve Rogers: I’m in the area now, if you want to meet me there. 

Natasha Romanoff: Will do. 

_ Call ended: 28 seconds.  _

-

_ Transcription of a telephone call between Sam Wilson and James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes, December 2023. Taken from Avengers secure database.  _

Sam Wilson: How you holding up?

James Barnes: I’m fine. You?

Sam Wilson: Same as always. 

James Barnes: I can’t believe he did that. 

Sam Wilson: Neither can I. It’s totally out of character. 

James Barnes: I’ve been wondering if he’s stuck. Y’know, in the quantum realm or whatever it is that they call it. 

Sam Wilson: Me too. You know what, I’ll have a talk to Banner. Apparently, Scott Lang - y’know, Ant-Man - had a situation before the Snap like that. Hank Pym’s wife had been in there for years and they extracted her. 

James Barnes: God, I can’t imagine that. 

Sam Wilson: As horrible as it is, I almost hope he really did choose to stay back. At least it would mean he’s relatively safe. 

James Barnes: Yeah. I get you. 

Sam Wilson: I’m sorry, Barnes. I know you two were close. Didn’t he talk to you before he went?

James Barnes: You’re the second person to ask me that. No, he didn’t. I mean, actually - he said something about wanting to “make it right”. 

Sam Wilson: What the hell does that mean? 

James Barnes: I don’t know. He can’t have done that, though. He was on good terms with Peggy, but it wasn’t like that. I don’t think it ever was. 

Sam Wilson: I’ll talk to Banner, for sure. I’ll get back to you. 

James Barnes: Alright. Thanks. 

Sam Wilson: See you. 

_ Call ended: 52 seconds.  _


	2. A Message from Steve's "Almost" to his "Maybe-In-Another-Time"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a transcript of an unopened voicemail from margaret carter to james buchanan barnes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did not mean to write another chapter 
> 
> also it is PAINFULLY obvious that i have not encountered anyone with dementia recently but if you see any issues with peggy being able to deliver an entire voice message like that, pretend that she wrote it down when she remembered so that she could tell it all when her "shield friend" (sharon) found bucky's number. also pretend that sharon has been helping her with this.

_ Transcription of a voicemail from Margaret “Peggy” Carter left on a disposable cellphone, presumably belonging to James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes. Message received at 15:03 on the 18th of December, 2015.  _

Margaret Carter: Hello, love. I don’t know if you remember me, but I barely remember you on the good days so I guess that makes us even. 

_ M.C. chuckles. _

Margaret Carter: Please listen to this message all the way through.  
  
I’m Peggy Carter. I worked with you and Steve during the war. Afterwards, I became the director of SHIELD. I know that the existence of SHIELD has allowed for a lot of terrible things to happen to you, and I’m so sorry, Bucky. I wish I had been stricter. I wish I had insisted that Arnim Zola stay locked up in a cell.   
I contacted an old friend who used to work at SHIELD and they helped me track down a number you might be using. I will promise you now that we are not going to use it to track your location in any way. I completely understand if you ditch this phone after you hear this message. But hear me through until the end, first.

My memory fails me, Bucky, but one of the things I know for sure about you is that you and Steve - that’s Captain America- are joint at the hip. You went everywhere together, even in the middle of the war where technically Steve had more clearance than you did. He fought hard to have the team he wanted. You were almost sent home on a psychological discharge. He insisted you were given the choice, and you stayed. 

When you fell - you might not remember, you fell off the side of a mountain trying to capture Zola, that’s how all of this that happened to you began - he was inconsolable. He went back to the bar in London where he asked you if you would follow him - follow Captain America, and you said no, I’m following that boy from Brooklyn - and drank just about half the bottles in the bar. It was bombed out, unfortunately, but that meant it was empty and no one could see that he sat and he drank and nothing did anything for him because he couldn’t get drunk, and he cried until there was nothing left. It took us hours to find him. He only stood up and continued the fight because he was determined to kill all of Hydra for what they did to you. That motive still stands. 

He’s trying to find you. I’m sure you know this, already. He wants to make sure you’re safe. If you remember anything about his personality, I’m sure you know that he will not push you to do anything you’re not okay with. He wants you safe and he wants you happy. If that means that you need time on your own, that’s alright. He’ll understand. 

I’m asking for you to reach out to him. You don’t have to talk to him face-to-face. Leave him a voicemail and if you can’t manage that, leave a note in his apartment. He still stops home, on occasion, even when he’s busy looking for you. He has this idea in his head that one day when he unlocks his apartment door you’ll be there, just like how it used to be. He needs you in the same way that you likely feel the need for him. Even if you don’t know how to reach out for your own sake, reach out for his. 

_ M.C. draws a shuddery breath.  _

Margaret Carter: Dear me, what was I talking about? 

_ There are several shuffling noises and the voicemail ends.  _

_ Voicemail length: 2 minutes and 12 seconds. Deleted at 16:23 on the 18th of December, 2015, unopened. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me on tumblr when i posted the link to this fic: haha this experiment failed i'm not trying this type of fic again  
> me not even 2 days later: hello i spontaneously wrote another chapter

**Author's Note:**

> the last transcript is what i imagine to have actually happened aka it's really a lead-in to the endgame fix it i'm gonna write eventually but. i think it is a common belief amongst captain america fans that endgame was bullshit and steve leaving for peggy is absolutely out of character.


End file.
